Tag: financial independent

Would Women’s Financial Independence Be a Challenge to Marital Happiness?

December 16th, 2024

Financial independence is now a hot topic in Indonesia. Many women dream of it, supported by increasing levels of education. Women’s opportunities to get jobs are wide open because equality is guaranteed by law.

In Indonesian tradition, women have long worked outside the home as teachers, traders, or tailors. In Minangkabau, for example, women have worked in the market for quite a long time.

In Batak culture, the wives, often called Inang-Inang, work in the family garden and sell the harvest to the market. They are hard workers and family heroes who bring children to a higher level of education and social status in society.

Their young generation now enjoys more stable work in modern offices as government and bank employees, lawyers, and teachers/lecturers. Some professions provide high incomes, and the smartness in reinvesting their money makes women achieve financial independence. Some have much higher incomes than their husbands. In such a situation, the husband must give space to his wife because the contribution given by his wife cannot be underestimated.

Is financial independence a factor in the high divorce rate in Indonesia? We must be careful in our assessment. According to media sources, the main causes of divorce in several big cities in Indonesia are constant quarrels, economic pressure, family neglect, domestic violence, and drunkenness.

The economic pressure above means a lack of allowance from a husband to his wife and children. That is certainly very different from financial independence that I mean. A woman’s financial independence will bring more happiness to a married couple and their children. It is not a trigger for divorce but positively resolves the family’s economic difficulties. At least a wife does not need to fight with her husband to get money for her personal needs.

Financial independence will also lead a woman to explore other skills that she wants. Many women with higher incomes study other skills, such as writing or photography, without sacrificing their previous jobs. Often, these new skills become an additional income.

Financial independence is a consequence of educational equality between women and men. I support it. If anyone objects, I feel that they may have been born in the wrong era. If financial independence can make a woman happy, we should support it.

A happy woman will be a more pleasant person for her husband, children, and extended family. Do you agree with me?
My Mother Talked About Financial Independence

December 8th, 2024

My resemblance to my mother is quite strong. I inherited some of her hobbies, including cooking, gardening, and sharing stories. I also adopted her generosity, religiosity, and sympathy for others (especially toward our relatives).

She did not have a higher education, but her point of view was logical and acceptable. My sister and I once commended her, “Our mother must have been an accomplished woman if she had the opportunity to have a career.”

I remember when she asked me not to leave my job even though my husband covered all my needs. A woman’s financial independence is substantial to maintain her happiness. “People change, and your husband may change too. You have to anticipate it. By having your own money, some problems can be solved.”

My mother had prepared me to be a strong woman. I was her eldest child. Even though I am a woman, I have to be ready to face the world with all its problems. The way my mother educated my mentality was truly astonishing because she was raised in a traditional culture that placed women one level below men. In Batak culture (we are from the Batak tribe, one of the tribes in Sumatra that strongly adheres to a patriarchal system), the woman is expected to be a loyal wife and devote her life to raising the children. Her happiness is defined by the success of her husband and children.

Maybe my mother was influenced by the Minang tradition (another tribe in Sumatra that holds a matrilineal system, in contrast with Batakness) where most women play a central role in managing family wealth.

Or, she had sensed that modern life demands people with good qualities to live in dignity. Both men and women must be financially independent and wise/kind-hearted to live in dignity.

Her advice accompanies my adult life. She passed away 15 years ago, but her spirit lives on with me every day. Her hobbies and her ‘want to be’ are always with me. I have been trying my best to make them true. All praise to her who has motivated me to become a strong woman.

Related article:

Being Wiser in Spending Money

Tag: financial independent

Would Women’s Financial Independence Be a Challenge to Marital Happiness?

My Mother Talked About Financial Independence